As a North Dakotan, I’m a bit perplexed by my neighbors to the east in Minnesota. For the most part, I consider them to be alright kinda folks. And then, at other times, I’m left wondering why they felt the need to elect Michele Bachmann, a woman with the brain of a squirrel, to be their Congresswoman.

Behold, mere mortals, the “wisdom” of the Bachmann.

“I am so proud to be from the state of Minnesota. We’re the workingest state in the country, and the reason why we are, we have more people that are working longer hours, we have people that are working two jobs.”

Michele, if you have a moment, I’d like to have a word with you. There’s a couple things I wanted to tell you.

One, workingest is a not a word.

Two, maybe you don’t know this, being an overprivileged twit and all, but for most people, having to work two jobs and longer hours is actually a bad thing. See, nobody works for fun. Nobody goes to their job because they expect to have a good time there. They do it because they have to eat. Work is only valuable in the sense that it provides a person with the money needed to buy food. So the only reason that a person would ever be working two jobs is because THEY HAD TO IN ORDER TO AVOID STARVING TO DEATH (I used capital letters there to drive my point home. Did you notice that? I hope so.). As such, you vapid braindead pig, people working two jobs is nothing that anyone takes any pride in. Rather, it’s something that a reasonable person would be HORRIFICALLY EMBARRASSED BY (Did it again. Good for me.).

On a side note, anyone else remember when family values meant something other than just a good reason why gays shouldn’t be allowed to marry? Seems to me it’s hard to install good and honest ethics into your children when you’re never actually at home spending time with them, what with the second job and all. But I digress.

So now, people of Minnesota, I turn to you and ask you this. Could you please explain to me why this woman is representing you in the halls of Congress? You know those two jobs you’re working right now, you workingest people, you? Here’s a thought. How about you hand one of those jobs over to Michele and see if she’s any better at it than she is at her current place of employment? At least when she’s working the graveyard shift at McDonalds, she won’t be embarrassing an entire state every time she opens her dumb mouth.