For everyone who’s been asking me, here’s the answer everyone’s been waiting so long for. If I had to, I could defend myself against the onslaught of up to 24 five-year-old children. And here’s my proof.
24
Now you may be asking yourself, why would I possibly need to beat up children? To which I can only [...]

Mr. Rogers always creeped me out when I was a kid.
But I saw this clip awhile back and it made my day. So, on a day when we’re two days removed from what is supposed to be one of the happiest days of the year, when it seems like so much of the world is [...]

 
You know, I’m as terrified of Axl Rose as the next guy, but this may be taking things just a little too far. 
Some people sing karaoke just beautifully.
Then there are the rest of us whose public singing talents range from fair through terrible to just plain scary.
But one school custodian’s attempts at song in Roxbury, Conn., [...]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bcaVSTsYyOI

I’ve been asked to post this video, which is a take on the hiring process we here at Sod employ. Now, I’m sure that, to some of you, this may paint Sod in a bad light. Please, let me assure you, we’d never, ever hire someone who finished first in their class at Harvard. Besides, [...]

Here you go, Chris.

Here’s something that nearly made me wet my pants.

This one, however, put me over the top.

you ever wonder what it looks like in your freezer when you don’t have the stinkin’ door open? well, wonder no more, you insufferable shithead. in celebration of the 2007-2008 polar year, the USGS has deigned it necessary to provide the world unprecedented access to the entire continent of antarctica, as seen from space, with the [...]

 
After a week’s worth of anti-Thanksgiving activities meant to cleanse this country of Thanksgiving once and for all, I awoke this morning in a surprisingly good mood and quickly ran outside to bask in my efforts. But once I got outside, I came to the surprising realization that all of my neighbors had gathered together [...]

A few weeks back, we decided that it was about damn time to get some new furniture in our living room. Sara and I have been living in our house for over three years now and have had the same couch, entertainment center and dining room table that entire time.
For about two of those years, [...]

Is it just me, or does The War On Christmas start earlier and earlier every year?
Personally, I enjoy declaring wars on holidays just as much as the next guy. I’ve been fighting with my birthday for almost a decade now. But Christmas? Why would I want to go fight a war on Christmas? That’s the [...]